Living Rarefied

This was a funny video that was sent my way from a buddy. Very very funny.

Ethan testing

Recently I have decided to email each person thanking them for commenting.
There's been a user who is one of the more frequent commenters who has used an invalid email address. I don't appreciate the passive-aggressive nature of posting useless comments on a blog if you can't own up to who you are.

Here's their latest junk. If this cowardly lion is going to question my life.. I will fire back with reponses to them.

well the lesson is pretty clear. dont buy all of that fancy tv stuff. it's expensive, regular tv is just fine and you (we) shouldn't waste time watching tv anyway, so it's probably a good thing after all so you should just forget about it. live a simple life. dont think it is so important to have fancy tv and phones and ipods and all that stuff. I like books and calling people on the phone (which of course was once considered hi-tech but now it's just normal)

1. not really a lesson to be learned here, it was venting…
2. what does "all that fancy stuff" mean?
3. what if you are watching the gospel channel on channel 15?
4. what is a simple life?
5. what books?
6. who do you call on your unfancy phone?
7. dp you have fun? you seem really sad and boring?
8. how's your job at target???

Ethan testing

Please review my true life story of DirecTv and me over the last few months. I hope its entertaining for you, as it has been painfully painful for me.

Ethan Daily, Feeling

experiencing some brokenness in my YL friends. I am trying to remember what its like to be a HS kid. What is the most important thing to somebody that age… What gets them upset, sad, happy, pumped up? What are the triggers?

• If a girl or guy doesn't see you the way you want them to see you, is that a big deal? YES
• If you don't get into the college you needed to get into, is that a big deal? YES
• If somebody else gets the same new phone you just got from your parents and the 2 of you are the only ones with it, is that a big deal? YES
• If you don't make varsity sports, is that a big deal? YES
• If you don't get all of your school work done, is that a big deal? YES
• If you get dumped by somebody you've dated for a week, is that a big deal? YES
• If you don't feel loved by parents, is that a big deal? YES
• If you don't feel loved by friends, is that a big deal? YES
• If you don't feel loved by anybody, is that a big deal? YES
• If somebody gossips about you untruthfully, is that a big deal? YES
• If a friend at school has committed suicide, is that a big deal? YES
• If friends at school or online talk about committing suicide and wanting life to be done, is that a big deal? YES
• If somebody thinks you are not smart when you believe that you are, is that a big deal? YES
• If somebody thinks you are ugly when you believe that you are attractive, is that a big deal? YES
• If somebody wont be sexually active with you, is that a big deal? YES
• If you wont be sexually active with anybody, is that a big deal? YES
• If you drive a car that isn't cool, is that a big deal? YES
• If you don't have a car, is that a big deal? YES
• If you don't have your license, is that a big deal? YES
• If your parents don't pay attention to your life except that you don't get in trouble and get your homework done, is that a big deal? YES
• If you get an A on a huge paper that you worked hard on, is that a big deal? YES
• If a new kid comes to school and is instantly more popular than you, is that a big deal? YES
• If you are struggling with drugs/alcohol but nobody knows, is that a big deal? YES
• If your spring break plans aren't the best, is that a big deal? YES

If you think life sucks, is that a big deal? YES!!!

I see so much lack of hope that comes from lack of affirmation. Lack of people telling you that you are worth something more than not getting in trouble, and getting your homework done on time and studying for tests and making the varsity teams. If kids don't hear that, what hope do they have? Even if you believe you are doing the best you can, somebody else is always going to tell you that you aren't and you will end up believing them instead of yourself. The list above is something I threw together in a few minutes, but I believe it doesn't even scratch the surface of the thoughts and pressures that are keeping our HS friends down.

I see some parents loving their kids in ways I am not sure is love. I don't have any research on this, but i would bet a lot of my money that if you asked every parent at any HS how they love their kids. Quite a few might say, 'I bought them a car', or 'I give them everything they want/need'. It would be scary to think that those types of responses might outnumber responses like 'I love them by spending time with them' or by 'dropping anything else I am doing if they need me for something' or 'by not giving them everything they want'.

I am not a parent, I am not claiming to know how to be a parent. But I do know that something is missing in a lot of kids lives. Affirmation, love and presence from parents and friends. I wish i had the resources to conduct a big survey with kids to ask them how they want to be loved by their parents.. and how they feel their parents are loving them currently. What if students were able to tell their parents how they wanted to be loved?

What if a parent worked 80 hour weeks and traveled a lot to make money for his/her family and give their family security in the financial realm. But their kids didn't care about that and only wanted their mom or dad to come to a sporting event of theirs, or to say 'I love you where you are at, I am glad you tried your best'.

I am all about honesty and open-communication. I think it would be amazing if it were commonplace for parents to ask their kids how they want to be loved, and kids to ask their parents how they want to be loved. We're all different and one method won't provide the love the world needs…

I believe the most important question we can ask each day is this.

HOW CAN WE LOVE KIDS BETTER???

Ethan Surprise Me

Got word that a bunch of instructors are ready to roll with my site (Book A Lesson). I need to do a few things to give them options for customization… But its a great group of golf instructors that will be strong advocates for me and what we're trying to do with it.

The site should be live in a few weeks!

UPDATE: 1 month or so…

Ethan Daily

I am realizing that I am very selfish with my time. I need to learn a few things and make some changes. Thankfully I have somebody in my life who is helping me learn.

Ethan testing

Top 4 look-alikes for me…

Ethan testing

Been some time since i have written out some thoughts.

life is strange, many times this year i have thought I was on a path or had a plan in mind and then it changes…  What a blessing these changes have been.  Sunday we watched a longer version of the video from our El Salvador trip, it was a great reminder of the amazing people we traveled with, most of the group back in 1 place again, gathering around a single goal, but mostly being back together again.  We were amped when we returned from the trip about spending a lot of time together, but have since faded in our weekly gatherings. i have fallen away spending time with a new friend, lots of time with Young Life since the school year has started.   All things good!

been working a ton on a new business venture i have been working on for a few months.  It seems like i leave my job, go to Caribou to do some more work for my startup.  www.bookalesson.com for you who are interested, there's only a blog that is public right now, but shooting in a few weeks to take the site public!

i am in a good place right now, lots of loving people around me now…

and I leave for Santa Barbara today!!

Ethan Feeling

I see many many people commit to an idea, not to an action.

I like "do'ers" more than "commit'ers"

Ethan Community, Daily, Feeling

They sound like opposites right?  I argue they are closer than it seems.

I have seen that the root of people who say "oh, I'm a people pleaser" are actually very selfish and when it comes down to it, don't do the pleasing they say they do.

When you commit to everything under the sun, it sounds like you are trying to please others with your time, but in reality you are making less and less time available for those things.  So you end up making a lot of empty promises.

Example:  I formed a support team for my church, so that after the service, we take all the items used in the service, (stage, candles, curtains, clean up the pews, etc.) its about an hour of work after the service, 2 sundays every 6 weeks.  Not a huge committment.  A few of us were talking about doing this team together, so I organized it.  Some other people caught wind of the group that was formed (they hadn't been contacted about joining the group because we had a set team, and nobody else expressed interest about it).  People started talking, not to me, but to others about how they felt left out of the loop on the deal.  I didn't feel too bad about the fact that they were possibly upset with me.  If you have a bone to pick, pick it… Don't talk about having a bone to pick.

I sent out an email to a larger group of people, including those who felt left out… Response.. Nothing.. Actually 2 people lessened their committments who were already signed up.

Next time somebody tells me they are a people pleaser, I am going to ask them why they say that and then follow up with my assumption that they probably end up making a lot of empty promises, find themselves stretched too thin, not enough time to more things that are healthy for your body/mind than not, and in the end just end up pleasing themselves.

My hope is that people prove me wrong.  I haven't seen many lately that are trying to prove me wrong.  If you please people, I have nothing against you, but i think your priorities are off.. You should first please God (which doesnt affect his love for you), please yourself and your needs.  Others will be pleased if you focus on those 2 things.  And you'll find life isn't as intense/crazy difficult to manage.  The things you do will be of worth, you might be happier & you wont have Ethan calling you out all the time.

Ethan Community, Surprise Me