2 questions…
Why is it that when you see someody you haven't seen much lately, they ask you 1/2 or 2/2 of these 2 questions in some form?
- So where do you work?
- Are you seeing anybody?
The first one is obviously the first step to seeing what's going on in your life. We spend a lot of time working, this is true.
My struggles are in those 2 questions? Why are they the most commonly asked questions? Are they the only things that define me? I feel like it is a common question from adults.. Like they want to use me as a meter for where they are in life, or where their children are in life. Kind of an ego booster, oh, Ethan isn't seeing anybody, not engaged, engagement not even on the horizon because there is no gal in his life?
Its like there are 2 trophies each person who asks me those questions feel I need. A trophy job and a trophy gal. I know the term is "Trophy Wife" but that second word scares me at this time.
I'd rather hear questions like…
Have you made any new friends lately? When was the last time you connected with your family? Your best friend? How are you living like Jesus? Are you loving others?
I get some interesting comments after I tell them about the 2nd question.. They switch from energetic to sympathetic very quickly. Here's a few things they say, and things I wish I could say back to them.
"Oh, keep on waiting, she'll come soon…" It reminds me of the Napolean Dynamite scene where Kip is explaining how LaFaunda is the best thing that has happened to him and how he's sure there's somebody out there for him.
"I bet you are just so focused on your career right now and have no time for somebody…" This I would say, yes I am focused on my career, but I focus on my career at the office and thats about it. I don't think there is a huge dating scene in a company of 8 people, all of which are married except me.
"You should enjoy your single life while you have it…" What makes you think I aint?
La Fawnduh.
Ethan…I would agree that these are not the two things that define YOU. The definition of you is far from that indeed. However, I would like to challenge you…How often do you find yourself asking others questions from your “ideal question list”? Better yet, how often do you ask those questions to people whom you don't consider your closest friends? I like your questions, they're great, they challenge me…So I thought I'd challenge you in return.
E,
Has anyone ever asked you about your match making success?
I think they should.
~Erik (&Julie)
This is the first time I have visited your site, after following a link from Reid's blog. It's good stuff. Be encouraged!!!
I would like to say that as an ill person, who does not have a a job other than to get better, and has not done anything other than that since October 04, it is hard that so much of people's opinion's of who you are is focussed on what you do everyday. being ill has taught me that you don't have to run around to please God, that he just wants to be with us and that we really find out who we are from taking time out to be with God. Our true identity really is found in Christ.
It encourages me that someone else recognises that who we are is not purely deffined by our job or by our marital status. THank you.
Ethan, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter.
E- I just want to say that your blog makes my day- you have such awesome insight and advice- I miss being around that!! Miss ya E Dawg